The Cheap Seats is the online store for Joe's Bleachers, home of super Cubs fan, Joe Schlombowski. Welcome.
JOE SCHLOM WHO?
I’m Joe Schlombowski, master of the Cheap Seats. I’ve been a Cubs fan since I was a kid. Since before astro turf. Since before reality TV and Blackberries and SUVs and the DH and $4-a-gallon-gas and CDs that you break a fingernail trying to open. Since Ron Santo, Fergie Jenkins and Ernie Banks. I came out of the womb saying, “Looks like a nice day for a ballgame. Let’s play two.”
WHY SHOP IN THE CHEAP SEATS?
My goal is to provide stuff for Cubs fans — the best and most loyal in baseball, not to mention really good lookin' and smart — that helps 'em demonstrate their passion for baseball’s most beloved team.
If you love the Cubs as much as I do — and/or hate the White Sox and Cards — this is a pretty good place to browse around. Plus, when you shop in the Cheap Seats you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing you’re in the most exclusive store of its kind; one where no fewer than zero famous celebrities shop and where not one single star athlete has provided endorsement. Impressive, huh?! How can you possibly pass that up? So…shop in the Cheap Seats, impress your friends, watch your popularity soar.
A NEW TRICK FOR AN OLD DOG.
While Joe’s Bleachers has been around a few years, the Cheap Seats have been open for about 5 minutes. And that’s a liberal estimate. As such, you'll notice there's not much in the way of stuff, just yet. That's gonna change, my friend, so please come visit now and then to see what's new on the Cheap Seats’ shelves. (Try saying’ that 5 times as fast as you can.)
WE’RE LIKE JOE MADDON; SMALL BUT GOOD.
This is a tiny operation. Microscopic, even. No one would ever confuse the Cheap Seats with Amazon. But hey, atoms are small, and I think we all know what they can do. KaBOOM! Point is, being small isn’t a handicap, it's just a fact.
We partner with Real Thread for our shirts, meaning they’re of the highest quality and softest feel. This is perfect for winning streaks cuz, as you know, you should never, ever, never change your underwear in the middle of one. That’s a little much for some people, who prefer not changin' the t-shirt instead of the boxers. At times like that, havin' a comfortable shirt can make all the difference between enjoyin’ the streak, and really, really enjoyin’ it.
As we add more items to our inventory, you can count on us to maintain the same standards we have now, while we’re ity-bity. Rest assured, anything offered in the Cheap Seats will be of the high-quality, with attention to detail at every turn.
Reach out and smack us, as needed. Got a question? Fire away. Wanna tell us how much you like your new stuff. Fantastic! We’d love to hear about it. Got a problem with something? Let us know how we can fix it for you.
CORPORATE RESPONSIBILITY? WE'VE GOT THAT.
Our Real Thread t-shirt blanks are sourced from BELLA + CANVAS, a company committed to maintaining and upholding responsible workplace and environmental standards. All US production and office facilities are WRAP Certified.
WRAP (Worldwide Responsible Accredited Production) is a globally recognized, independent 3rd party certifying body whose mission is to promote ethical, humane and lawful conditions and practices in all manufacturing facilities. Companies accepted into the WRAP organization go through an extensive application process in which manufacturing facilities, working environments, and worker's rights are inspected and approved by the WRAP association. WRAP certifications are awarded based upon both internationally and nationally accepted humane workplace standards, local laws, and ethical manufacturing regulations.
HIT THE BLEACHERS, PAL.
If you live and die with the Cubs, check out Joe's Bleachers, a place where Cubs fans rule, and sometimes dream about slippin' Exlax into the Cardinals' Gatorade.
In particular, the Joe Sez blog is where you can keep up with whatever the Cubs are doing...and whoever they're doin' it to. It's got the special — some would say 'warped' — Joe Schlombowski twist to it. You're invited to chime in, too. You got an issue with somethin' I said? Bring on the heat. I welcome that fluff you call chin music. You agree with me? Hey, you know what they say about great minds. You wanna weigh in on instant replay, or the fact that Obama is a Sox fan, or that sissy new second base slide rule, or if there are corn dogs should there be corn brats (no)…then the Joe Sez blog is the right place.
JOE'S BLEACHERS FACEBOOK.
If you follow Joe's Bleachers on Facebook, you'll get all the Joe Sez commentary, plus all the other stuff that's worth yakin' about in the wide, wide world of sports.